Attachment Parenting

More and more I am realizing that my parenting style is very different than the culture's parenting philosophy - even in the Christian community. I am very far from being a perfect parent and I never feel like I have it all together! However, I am very saddened by much of the current thoughts on parenting - especially parenting infants and toddlers. Admittedly, I am very passionate about "attachment parenting" as described and encouraged by the Sears family in their many parenting books. But aside from being somewhat influenced by Dr. Sears, I believe very much that my personal beliefs about parenting come from my own inner sense of the way God wants for me as a mother to nurture and discipline and love my children. The Sears' books were more of a validation of my own parenting philosophy rather than me adapting to their philosphy. That's why I love those books so much! They affirm my deepest beliefs of parenting children.

Because I am so passionate about attachment-style parenting, I struggle so much with all the other ideas out there about parenting babies and toddlers. Sometimes I am deeply saddened by what I read and hear and witness. Sometimes I am upset by advice given on Christian radio to young parents. For example, I am not a big advocate of spanking! And that is very contrary to many in the Christian community. But I do believe in discipline. And I don't believe in rigid scheduling of babies or baby-wise parenting. I believe that babies need to be held most of the time and not be carried around in their carseats. I believe that you cannot spoil an infant. I believe that their cries are to be comforted. I believe that my job as a parent is not to "break their wills." I believe that babies are of equal worth and in need of respect as adults. I believe that parents should be polite and respectful in speaking to their children (and vice versa). I believe that 99% of discipline involves modeling correct attitudes and behavior. I believe that every parent should try to say YES as much as possible and say NO when necessary. I believe that my life is not more important than the lives of my children. I believe that my schedule, my comfort, my convenience is not the most important thing. Parenting involves sacrifice, selfLESSness, and humility. Children are to be respected, loved, cherished and well disciplined. They are to be taught by example. They are to be valued, esteemed, and treated like the gifts from God that they are. And most of all, they need to be prayed for, instructed in the Word, and discipled in their own personal walks with the Lord. Parenting is not easy! It is not supposed to be easy. But the rewards and blessings are vast and immeasureable.

I have many, many, many more thoughts on parenting young children but they are much better presented in the very well-written The Baby Book by Dr. Sears and his Guide to Christian Parenting book. For those books and other parenting info. go to www.drsears.com